Being a Mixed Girl

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being a mixed girl is hard every race dislikes you for different opposite ridiculous reasons I’m too quiet uppity and a know it all in the hood I’m too traumatized loud and scary for my white liberal friends my native friends just look at me sideways because they have the best manners they all ghost me being a mixed girl is hard I dont fit in or look like either side of my family so I try to find a band of misfits but those never stay together either outcasts artists healers and hippies being a mixed girl is hard I’ll never be enough for anyone black enough white enough native enough similar to anyone enough to belong being mixed feels wrong swirly fucked undecided square peg not a good fit being a mixed girl is hard I hardly even cook any of my cultures food but I make the best tacos, curry and egg rolls which is ridiculous cause I’m not Mexican, Asian or from India but their food is so much better than this American gmo garbage being a mixed girl is confusing elluding racial ambiguity shapeshifting code switching is saying “nigga” in my head daily but not letting it come out of my mouth ever is speaking a dozen versions of English each with entirely different different lexicons only liberals and geeks know the word lexicon being a mixed girl means I have no idea what i am supposed to wear or do to my body anywhere shave dont shave tattoo dont tattoo dreads no dreads what ever products to blend for my hair and just screw trying to find a foundation color cause I am literally color changing with the seasons being a mixed girl is confusing What am I? Fuck if I know! A third of family tree is question marks and lost connections secrets and new found family members pop up that no one wanted to talk about or even wanted them to live being a mixed girl is family racism one side says you should pass for anything but black and one side is victim blaming racists neither of which share my universal spiritual beliefs being mixed is a relief that I dont have to fit in or believe anything I am free to leave or be me anyway anywhere I want to I can be anything and anyone I look at the world and know I could be related to you or you and that scientifically in a room of 100 people I’m at least 20 peoples 6th cousins but it’s hard being a mixed girl because it seems I’m the only one that looks at the world of my potential cousins and thinks we should all pray together at witches match to heal yep thats just me and we should break bread together eat cause curry tacos with kimchi are delicious really I make em all the time its not that hard

Poem by Lennée Reid

Listen to my spoken word album “The Second Coming of Matriarchy” on bandcamp

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Shady Bitch

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Shady Bitch

I’ve been called a nigger in the summer
Then beaner until late fall
But winter til mid spring
No one guesses wtf I am at all!

Cause I’m a shady bitch
Shape shifting witch
I am rainbow colored inside and out
People always try to figure me out

They ask if I’m Hawaiian Middle Eastern
Mexican part Korean or a quarter Jew
(Nice hair)
I say no I’m not but thanks a lot
I do enjoy their food

In the shade cause I’m a bitch
A shade privileged bitch
I am rainbow colored inside and out
Don’t even try to figure me out

I’m black I’m white I’m native
I might just be a smidge of something else
(Who knows)
But one things for sure my heart is pure
I’m just trying to be myself

And still I get called a nigger in the summer
Then beaner through late fall
But I never get called a wetback
Because I’m to light and too tall

Oh Yes I said it!
          Winter through spring
Don’t you forget it
           I could pass for half anything

I’m so shady
           Shape shifting and rainbow colored
I could be anybody’s
           Sister cousin or mother

I keep my ass out of the sun
To minimize exposure to racism

Ain’t that some shit?
I’m such a shady bitch

                                            Lennée Reid©

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